Being What I Always Wanted To Be.....

Writing has always been healing to me. It has always happened that I would have words articulated exactly the same way I am thinking them when I am writing but when I speak I always miss somethings and then I redo it in my head. Has it happened to you? I went back many times to retrospect why so? It took me to as back as I could remember where I was hardly 8 years old and used to maintain a diary where I talked everything "to" it. "Dear diary..." and it went on everyday. I had so much to tell my diary and if someone asked me how was school today, I would say fine. There were no big secrets spilled there. What secrets would a 8 year old have? I still remember journaling stuff like, "Oh it was such hot weather today! We did not even get enough water breaks! How unfair?!" But if someone would ask me later "You seem dehydrated." I would say "Oh, is it?" So having never acknowledged for all these years that I am the most expressive and ...

There are a lot of times in life when you look like this confident successful person on the exterior while you are fighting a battle inside every second. You have this timid little person inside this brave shell.  Recently I faced such situation where I was a confident achiever a day before but there were upcoming challenges right around the corner that clouded my self-confidence every other second. I didn’t know if I was good enough. Every pointed finger made me question myself. Unfortunately there came an awful night before a big morning where I broke out. I didn’t see anyway out and I wanted to run and hide in my shell.  You know, it so happens often that when you are in such a phase, you are best for you! There is no one who can understand you better than yourself and it’s your own battle to fight and win over. But being humans, we look upto our family and friends to rescue us.  Being a woman, lately I have learnt there is nothing better than female friendship(s) to g...