Day 260 (The self-proclaimed advisers)

Some people are just too nosy or feel they should be advising in everyone's business. And I often come across such people here and there.

This was a couple of months ago, when someone I acquainted over a game of table tennis got to know that I write blogs. He asked me many times to share the link. I pretended to have forgotten to share but then shared it eventually when he pinged me a couple of times over chat. So, he read my blog for which I did not expect any feedback, but he takes the pain to give it to me. There was this blog I wrote about my husband a while back which titled "Disadvantages of having a sane husband". He asked if the incidents I quoted there actually happened or I just made them up. I just replied it happened ofcourse. He laughed over it and then came to the advisory business. He tells me, if he were me, he would use a lighter shade for my blog theme if I want others to read without straining their eyes. Well, I can appreciate your negative comments on my writing as that's one of the purposes of blogging (since you are making them public). But the theme of the blog? From someone whom I did not press or push to read it? I still kept quite and said okay. Then he gave me couple of examples of colors or themes (I don't remember now which among the two) to use.
Maybe he was right? Maybe it strained his eyes and some other's. But, then I found it too nosy from him to try and persuade me to go to that length to make my blog more "presentable". He could have simply stopped reading them!
Then again, we meet at a reader's group meeting where we share which book we are currently reading, what's it about etc. There again, blogging pops up. I keep mum as I don't really want to share it with people in office. Oh, I just realized I forgot to tell you that this guy works in the same firm as I do. So this meet and the table tennis, everything happened at workplace. Anyway, moving on...
So on blogging he gallantly shared his blog bragging (which I know is a strong word) that he writes short stories which always have a message or else he writes spiritual blogs. People appreciated him and asked for his blog link. It could have ended there. But then this guy again says that "Supriya also writes blogs". Okay, thanks for publicizing it and I am still mum with a smile on my face. Then he adds saying however, her blogs are too personal, they do not have a message really and need a little grooming. Basically they are very different from mine. And I just say, yes my blogs are very different than his.
Well, people ask me to share my blog link too (which sounded more like a formality than a cheer) and we end the meeting.

Now, when I am towards the end of this story, I realize if this guy still strains his eyes on my writing; he might read it and get offended and stuff. Well, did I mean to offend him? No. I just meant to share a true story (without any message maybe). Should I delete this blog or change privacy settings? No. I haven't done this ever and won't do it too and god and I know how many times have I offended people in the past and how least I care.

But then the moral of the story is, it is very clear from the body language or facial expressions when you are advising someone to decide whether they want to take your advice or not. And I am not saying everytime someone doesn't want your advice means that you should stop giving it. It might be you are constantly advising a heart-broken friend, your kid or your sibling. They don't want to hear it but you have the right to keep pressing it on them as you play an important role in their life and it matters in the long run. So, my blog might not have a message but it is just a write-up for the nosy ones that they should narrow down their targets to be appreciated for the divine knowledge that they share in this not-so-divine world.


  1. Hahahaha sorry but I cant stop laughing. I am grinning as I type this; similar things and worse things have happened to me too. People have fought over what I should write; how I should write and bitched about some of my posts forming an email group. I used to wonder what the group's name would've been - "Bitching about B Log Association" perhaps?

    Anyway, it so happens that people take it upon themselves to advice. On top of it they think they are right. Blogging is one's choice; the topics, the style are all their own choice. There is no rules to it and judging the content is stupid. You've got a bug of a blog reader there!

  2. Well, I had somebody with whom I had 0 relationship telling me that I only wrote about my daughters in my blog, which -according to him- was a terrible message for them because "I had no life". Who asked him, right? To give unasked advice only to say bad things is just mean. To make it public... VERY mean.

    Just out of curiosity, did you read his blogs? Bet he's not as good as he thinks he is.


    1. Hi Ana,
      Thanks for reading and providing your valuable comments :)
      Yes I have read his blogs. But then, I think it depends on the taste of genre you would like to read. His writing is not my like-able genre. But I am sure there would be readers out there who would like his reading.
      PS- I won't like to comment anything else because I don't want to be one of those "self-proclaimed advisors" who would tell others what they should or shouldn't read. :)


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