DAY 302 (So much to learn..so little time!)

So, I have never been a person who tried to boost herself up with pre-conceived notions. Ever since I had hit my teen, it was pretty obvious to me that I am not gonna make friends or be likeable based on my looks. So the only option I have is my brain. Maybe, just maybe if I am smart enough I might fit into some group. 

Also, I have always had this weird problems of making friends from girls/women. And it is hard to sometimes find the right guys to be friends with without sending them and the world any wrong ideas. Now, its double pressure: I have to be smart enough, but just enough to fit a group of decent guys. Phew!

So, I was good in grades in school but I think I was teachers' pet too. I scored more to impress teachers rather than to learn something. So, I hated Physics but I would still be amongst the top 5 scorers of the school. So you can imagine my lack of learning and my desire of "winning". I loved literature but I was taught that there is no "future" in it. So I scored more but never got any "yay" moments out of it.

So, I realized (right before my teens were to be over) that if there is anything decently "smart" about me, it is: reading and writing. Now, reading...well can it be called a skill? Uh..no! Anyone can read, I just like to read. Infact I want to read all the books in the world. But is that an introduction to be "smart enough"? No! 

Writing...well whenever I wrote something "good" (reviewed by me ofcourse), the universe always showed me a better blog post, a better poetry hanging around in the world. And there are millions of them! 

So well, I decided that I should give up trying to be smart because lets face it..I am not! And let me just do my thing. As expected, my grades fell in college (sometimes just enough to get through!) and I was pretty content with it.

So I continued my reading and writing in my spare time, talked to any fellow readers (if I found any) and smiled to myself if I found someone reading the same book I read and have an imaginary book discussion with them. 

Reading all this, you would think, I am a loner (basically not many friends). But no! Somehow I made friends (each friend being the forever one) throughout my journey and each stage of my life gave a forever friend. So I do not have any group of friends (who know each other) but I have individual friends who are equally dear to me.

After college, I did think about it that I never made a forever friend in this 4 years of my life! Strange! And bam...a year after college-end me and hubby (my ex-classmate from college) became a couple and now we have a 4 year old!

So until, I got to know my husband I was pretty confident to myself that atleast I like to read or maybe I like to write. It "can" be a skill based on how I present it, an intellectual hobby. But then this man re-defines smartness for me! He is good in academics, so much so that he remembers all the theories and formulas and explanations and what not from school AND from college. He reads, he has played every sport (he will correct me saying that he hasn't played polo though..duh..!) and some to even professional levels, he can sing well, he is polite, a gentleman and has a tight group of friends! Okay..so that's what's called being smart! 

Never mind... I will do my thing and do what I do. After all, what else can I do.

Just when I thought there is so much to learn from this man, I got a boy. A toothless, fits in my palm boy who is so small and just came out of me! Oh there is so much to teach him and show him and learn "with" him.

And bam..! 4 years later, he has his first day of school. He is so excited! Although he is clueless what happens in school, which kids are there, how many are there, who is his teacher, but he tells me confidently "I will tell my teacher and ask everything Mumma, don't worry". Me and hubby drop him and once he excitedly runs away without even saying goodbyes, we stand there like 2 toddlers with teary eyes who don't know what to do for the next 3 hours of our lives. We pick him up anxiously after 3 hours and his excitement still isn't down! He wants to know why is it over too soon. He has his victories, his defeats, his complaints all wrapped in 1 day but he is so excited when will tomorrow come to go again.

He doesn't care whether his friends (classmates) like him or not but everyone is his best friend! He doesn't care if teachers didn't give him what he wanted but he loves his teachers! He tells me everyday what happened in detail and asks me when he will go next. 

So, just when I thought that there was so much to learn from the big man, this little man, opened up an alternate reality altogether. A reality where there is no expectation, no losses, no sadness, but just excitement! Everything else will fall into place.

So I don't know how long the life is gonna be but even if there is half of it left, there is so much to learn..and so little time! And so everyday I get up gearing up to learn from these men and become "Smarter" than yesterday! :-)

So here's me wishing the best father that I know of..my husband..a very happy Father's day in advance from the little man who plays a big role in achieving this award :-)