Being What I Always Wanted To Be.....

A new day..a new beginning! Hmm....well....festivity is all around us here. After all its holi..! But more than the tradition its like just doing for the sake of it and at times disrespecting the festival too. I really hate those lafanga guys who just do nothing else than making it difficult for the girls to enjoy the day. Shouting...misbehaving...and doing nonsense stuff is all they know! Sometimes they even forget its a day to celebrate the tradition of Indian culture. I really pity those people. Moreover...I also hate girls who are like conscious of their beauty and skin while playing colours. True...that obviously we should be careful and use good quality colours and all. But that is it. All those na na...and then please I don't play holi....and sitting inside the house locked up watching tv...surfing net or reading novels are really an insult to the pride of the heritage. Festival means celebration..! Atleast do that. Celebrate the happiness. Be happy and cheerful! Just enjo...

A few days ago when I and Akansha were talking on phone...I just said... its been 8 years to our friendship. She corrected me and said "9 years sweetie...9 years..!!" Yeah true! 9 years! And then I realized how static my life has become. Everything so steady and firm at its place. Not a sign of an air blow even. And thats what happens. Whatever your state of mind is....you take it by default that the world is following you in the same flavor. But thats not true. Everything keeps on going....even your own life which you always presume to be static. And then I also realized that this might be a reason for my regular blogging too. Just to assure myself that things are still moving...earth is still rotating ! People tell me that once I join to work....it will be impossible to be a regular blogger. But time will tell. Blogging is something which has been the best friend in these hard times....it is something which has given a perfect vent to my thoughts and feeling... whenev...

For the first time in these last 67 posts...I am doing blogging right after I just woke up. Although you guys will see it as always at 1:30 pm....which is is these guys' 12am actually (whateva...). Anyway...well yesterday I saw this movie called MONA LISA SMILE . You people might have watched it. And if not...please do. Its such an amazing story. Its about this lady (played by Julia Roberts) who comes to a prestigious university of girls called Wellsley to teach ancient history art. The story circulates in the year 1954...when there were people who were quite orthodox...and where girls were only taught or made graduates so that to get a good bridegroom. And then how this lady tries to make a difference....to teach her students to think outside the box. One thing which still is echoing in my mind said by her in the movie is that "if we would not think different....what history would the future scholars read..??" There are very rare people who dare to do that. And teac...

Ohhhh..what a wonderful morning it was today..!! The starting of the day has to be good in order to keep you smiling and I am sure you'll agree with me. And if the day starts with the most beautiful person of your life (in my case my SOUL-FRIEND AKANSHA)  its like something that rocks the day inside out. Same happened with me today. I got a morning wake up call from Akansha...just to wish me a good morning! And my morning became the best of all.  Its really true...that if something very pleasant happens to you right at the starting...you really get immune to the bad things (if any) following them. Its not that you have to ignore the ugly sequences...its just that they do not affect you anymore...as if they are not there. And thats a rocking feeling..!!! I personally love it...when someone tries to annoy me and I keep on being happy,cheerful and smiling (without pretending) and then the other person gets annoyed himself. Thats really so cool..lol..!! :D " All is well that...

This post is purely dedicated to my dear ANALYSIS FRIEND and my sweetheart AKANSHA..!!  First of all...a heartfelt thank you to my analysis friend...for being a friend, philosopher and guide for me yesterday evening. He really deserves a public applause and thats why I am showing gratitude in public. Sometimes you need to hear the coolest things said in your own way...and when you get that to your ears...you have all the smiles on your pretty face. It was totally unplanned (yes I replaced the word "unexpected"...) that I would be guided through him....as it has never been this way. But bad things bring along the good things following them as well. And thats so cool..!! :) About I and akansha...we talked for really long last night...and it was all about the future. How she would bear my expenses....how much part of her earning would be mine (what else are friends for....lol)....and how are we supposed to be as regular as today after we get settled. It was really a fun conv...

We all become bitchy at some point or another. We name it as gossiping...discussing....or simply talking...but get real..!! It is bitching...!! I never say...that I have been ideal ! No one is perfect...and the ideal thing does not exist. What makes you different or exceptional is whether you face it or not. I can and I do. And that saves me by the edge to be a bitch! I have done mistakes...blunders...may be sins..! But I have that stamina to face it...to admit it. But I have seen people...who bitch around and then turn their backs. When being asked...they bring to notice others' faults and corner themselves. And there... they become the bitch..! If you don't have the guts to admit what you did....then you can't really claim to have the right to point the other person as well. Who are you? The supreme authority...sent by God...to decide who is the angel and who is the devil? I am sorry...thats a myth. And you are living a myth. Gossiping is fine...infact good at times...

I have come blank to this NEW POST  section today. Don't have a clue of what to scribble ahead. So now...I make a confession today. Since my birth....I have been more around my paternal grandmother (Dadi..) than my own parents. She understood my needs....knows me inside out. And thats how I and my Uncle (Chacha...) are such good buddies. But for my maternal side....I was never ever bothered. Thats because simply neither did we visit them often nor was there any attachment from my side henceforth. Whenever we cared to visit...it used to be some mandatory-to-visit ocassions like RAKSHABANDHAN, BHAI-DOOJ etc. And to cope up with the time period I used to prefer my Aunt's (Maami's) and her daughter's (Akansha..this is a different Akansha..) company. They were the best to talk to. My grandparents (Naana and Naani) have always loved me from the core of my heart. Whenever I visited them...they had something new to gift me. Sometimes...it was the best sweets of the town...so...

It has always been with me the same kind...if I improve on something...I worsen somewhere else. And thats not good. All in all...I am STUCK...!! "Celebrating the achievement" v/s "working more on improvisation" has always been a task for me. It still is...it always will be. And no one can guide me through...I literally mean NO ONE...!  I cannot quote any example here.. I am sorry...but I find it so clearly in my persona. Its like the reflection of a mirror....no chances of doubts.  The thing is ....that its harder to decide whether its something positive or negative. To console myself...its positive ..but when being transparent...its a question mark...!! You learn throughout your life. Probably thats why God has given an average life span to all humans...no matter how hard you try...you can never claim that you are done because its still more. And then at one point...the time is up..!! The irony is...that no matter how factual this statement is.....some ...

I am quite in a hurry today as its my sister's school farewell and I have to go and drop her and then pick her up as well. Meanwhile I'll spend some quality-time with my grandma..! I quite need that actually. Meeting her...being with her and spending time with her. And no...they are all not the same things. My sister is wearing the first saree of my life which I bought for my college farewell last year. Trust me...it cost me a fortune...! So I have quite irritated her by giving her the tips to handle my prized possession..! Nothing new in it...because I did the same...when she started riding my scooty :P ..! And since she knows me the way I am... so I have no fears! No matter how long it has been...but you are always insecure when your sister borrows any piece of your wardrobe (all my girl-friends who are blessed with sisters would understand this). Just to be a goodie-goodie-sister you never frown...but you do cut out a piece of your heart when you allow her. So my point i...

Yes...to all those who are concerned...I am chilled out now! Writing is the bestest (that's not a word...I know..but it just fits here so well..!) buddy one can ever have. You can spill out anything you want,anytime you need...it won't even complain...ever! Anyway...I completed my first novel of Mills and Boons named THE DESERT PRINCE the day before yesterday. And it was awesome. That was the kind of romance I was looking forward to read...and I found it...Yipppppppieeeee...!! Well...there is someone whom I wanted to introduce in my post a long ago...but my priorities just kept on changing. Today...I don't wanna miss the flow. Stop guessing about him as you are not gonna get to him even in the thousandth attempt. He is my 55 year old  GARDENER! Ahaaa..aan...you read it right..! ...My gardener! Today when I see money ruling everywhere....with honesty and hardwork being sold at the "per kg" rate....I find this man standing outside the crowd. And I really adm...

To all those who believe that they are the most superior people ever... You are big time losers! Yes you are...you can count on me for that. I couldn't say it on your face because I have my etiquettes still embedded inside me. I couldn't blew you off because I have grown up with the culture of my grandmother. I couldn't slap you back because God sent you a little earlier than me on the planet. But I can always write it down. FUCK YOU...!!! If you are one horny pervert out there..you think everyone has burning hormones. I am sorry dude! You really need medical attention. I mean...you are telling me that I AM A GIRL...AND I CAN'T HELP IT! ITS NOT MY FAULT BUT THATS HOW IT IS.  Ha ha ha...you married a woman ...you remember? You have daughters....you realize that? And if its a generalized concept then I guess they also are as feminine as I am. So check that out for your own sake! The irony is...that people who know me....inside out....are sitting there hearing the...

I always think that I have learnt it...but every other time I get to learn even more. Life is never full. Be it in any prospect. You always encounter a twist here and there. And the craziest part is that you can never generalise the nature of the twist. Sometimes its bitter,sometimes sweet and rest of the time its salty. And that gives the flavour to it. After all...variety is the spice of life! Everyone gives a different definition of life...living life....etc. But I couldn't ever settle down to one drawn conclusion. Every new angle attracts me with same magnitude and I get drawn to it with the same ease. Although everyone else does the same too...but there are very few who admit that they do dance on the tunes of it. Optimism-pessimism,tears-laughter,love-hatred,day-night and what not! You name it and you have it. Thats whats the magic of this amazing thing called LIFE.  I wonder if some great mathematician oriented all these permutations and combinations.  So now I h...

Hmmm...since yesterday I was too busy with the SWEETHEART EFFECT (which as a matter of fact...still I am),I forgot to tell you guys certain things which happened as well.  Finally I got to buy the novel. And surprisingly...my mother gifted me 4 novels instead of 1 !!! Now that was awesome! It was totally unexpected (this word can't leave me alone) and came out to be as a rocking surprise. In the mall...I gotta meet one of my school friends as well and it was after 5 years almost that we had seen each other. Any bit of school gives me a big wide smile and this one too did the same. It all happened on Valentine's day. Ohhh...again forgetting to mention the name of the novels...3 are of the Mills and Boons' collection and the last one is The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.  Hmmmm....so I hope I am done with all the left overs. Now...coming to the present.... Not in a delightful mood. Not really actually. While facebooking....I just happened to visit someone's profile w...

Ohhhhhhh...I completely fell in love yesterday! And now I have that air flowing all around me as well. Its a little different from all of you but its much... much more special than any of you for sure. As quoted in a movie HUM TUM..."kabhi kabhi ek pal me pyar ho jata hai...aur kabhi kabhi saalon lag jate hain..!" so mine was the latter case....it took 8 long years to realize this. And if any of you would have been there...there would be a real street fight for HER.  Yes...her!  Oh common...I am completely straight. Does every love stands by the pillar of sexuality??? Think again. Even you might have loved someone madly....who not necessarily was of the opposite sex but you couldn't stop being carried away by him/her. Think wide. There are much more wider things than that double bed in your bedroom. And if you still can't beat it then stop reading this one. Anyway...so those who are still reading might  be wondering...who is the SWEETHEART!! Right? Its AKANSHA! ...

Its the V-day finally....and once again in contrary to my expectations...everything is just getting soooooooo rocking! I bet if I had a boyfriend or something like that it would have been much more dull than this.  Early morning started with a loving hug from mom and dad (I can really count on my fingers those hugs) which really made the day beautiful. Wishing Dadi,Baba (grandparents) and Chacha,chachi (uncle & aunt) proceeded it with much more glory.  All my dearest friends called me up and wished me (that was ultra sweet) and finally the day will end up with Akansha's party of her mom dad's 25th anniversary. And the greatest thing is Dadi would also accompany me. Isn't all of it just ammmmmmmmmazingly great!! And I am soooo delightful today. Celebrating love is not just for your beloved or spouse. It has all relations in it as a ingredient. Relations which are as long-lasting and as forever as they could ever be.  And I am loving it..!!  I guess...I have t...

Guys...its such a bad weather here! The weather manager up there is confused whether to bid farewell to the winters or not. And thats why I couldn't go to buy the GIFT (the novel) either. I am so glad that I finally got some reviews from you guys. But,being told by Akansha that I have missed being a girl by not reading any romantic fantacy of MILLS AND BOONS ,I think I have put my foot down to it eventually. Now,lets see...nobody knows what I'll buy finally.  The thing is...that this stupid V-DAY is round the corner and I am really sick and tired of it. The whole week has been so f***ing devastating for me because almost everyone around me is engaged and have someone to celebrate with... this stupid series of love. And I am damn single..!!! Why the hell is there not any week for the singles to celebrate so that people like us can make those committed fools jealous???  All I see these days on gtalk, facebook or orkut are status like LOVE IS IN THE AIR and bla bla blaaa......

Hmmmm...after a long gap...yesterday CHANZ  got hold of me in her tag box....  So here I am. But before that...I am really angry with you guys...for not helping me out on my yesterday's post.. It was only CHANZ  and MY ANALYSIS FRIEND  who bothered to help me... Moving on to the tag... 10 honest things about myself......hmmmmm 1. Everything thats inside my mind or heart comes out on my face every other time...no matter how hard I try to hide. It has cost me a lot many a times and I am still trying to improve. 2. I pretend to be very strong and professional...but anyone can easily grab me in the web of emotions. All they have to do is treat me just nicely once....or just be a good company in the first meeting.. (errrrr...I hope I am not mistaken by revealing this) 3. I love my grandmother more than anyone else in the world. And I am very very verrrrrrrrrrrrry attached to my Chacha,chachi (Uncle,aunt) too but I feel that they think I am more attached to ...

 Ahaaaa...its polling time for you guys and its pretty serious. Well..my mom in the rarest time of my life wants to gift me something. Why?? Because I got my engineering degree finally..! Cool no?? But contrary to my expectations (Yes...again expecting...I cannot change!!) she offered me to buy a book this time (generally she offers to buy clothes)...that too a good novel. I am overwhelmed....feeling to be on cloud nine. Tomorrow most probably we'll go the store. But now the problem is...which book to buy ?? Naaaaah...not any of those Indian writers book...whom I often buy every other time. That I can afford myself. Its from mom...this time. So price is not the concern. (Wink...wink...) I searched a lot on Google yesterday. But there are endless options. How do I decide? I am so entangled! Asking a friend for help ...gave me some suggestions on fantacy kind of novels....Harry Potter sort of things...!! But...naaaaaaaaaaahh.....I can't really stand them either. I want ...

Something which I wanna share about my return journey from Bareilly to Lucknow. Well...I was accompanied by 3 more girls...which was quite unexpected again. One of them was my batchmate....and other two were juniors. I was only friends with one of the juniors among the three people. My batchmate is quite an introvert....and so she didn't talk much. But the other junior....came out as a surprise for me. Why? Because...when I was in the college...she couldn't gel along well with any of her seniors I guess...and so we never interacted or had any opinions about each other. Although she belonged to Lucknow itself...and I knew her schooling background and all...but still I guess...never happened to interact anyhow. As I knew it from other batchmates of mine...she was supposed to be quite rude and ill-mannered. But I really wondered yesterday....what went wrong in the MASS INTERPRETATION !!!  I found her very well-behaved and quite an intellect actually. A person...who reads a l...

I am so so soooo sorry guys.!! I really tried so hard but couldn't really get a single second for internet. Being surrounded by so many people just kept me pre-occupied. And you know what...when you do not expect anything ...or you expect the worst...then everything seems to be rocking with the reference! And so it did...!! CONVOCATION JUST ROCKED...!!! There was a new auditorium constructed in the campus...which was really quite amazing and it was inaugrated with the NINTH CONVOCATION OF SRMSCET  which was ours..!!! In the same 2 days....two of my very close juniors shared their birthday....so it turned out to be double celebration as well..!! On top of it....the people whom I usually hanged out with....or were sick and tired of did not come to attend the ceremony. Those who came had a little but fun conversation with me and thus there was so much more and more to talk and have fun with. Another criteria which rocked was....among all the pairs of the college...only one o...

By the time you will be reading this...I would be nearby bareilly somewhere for my convocation tomorrow. Ohhhh...and still I can tell you a day prior to it that the journey is gonna be horrible...it always is. I just wish sometimes...that if I could skip the approx 5 hours of this horrible thing. But no..its not possible !! I have to go through it..! And I really really wish..that this is the last time that I have to visit the haunted centre (Yes I hate it to this extent..!!). Why am I writing the post prior a day to it? Because I won't get time once I reach there (Apply some common sense..) and secondly...I do not want to miss my punctual sequel here in the planet of blogging (Yes...you can applause). Although...I can't predict which kinda cartoons would I see (Yes...see...and not meet) this time in the train  but they will be cartoons for sure. And then two days at the same damn f***ing place would be like a nightmare again. But I know I'll manage. I AM A COMPLA...

Hmmm..so as you can see here in my new ADD-ONS  ...I am finally caught by Twitter too. I never really could understand why its such a hype...why people insist me to join it.....and then being regular there too. But lets see...may be I'll be able to find out the reason someday and then will let you know.  Moving on...I doubt if you guys know that I was one of those PROMISES ARE MEANT TO BE BROKEN  kind of person till a few days ago. But recently...I have noticed something. I have started taking my verbal commitments seriously for a change!  I mean it gets to be like a  DO OR DIE  situation for me now. And its good. I can be judgemental here because the promises which I have been keeping lately have really made me happier...much happier than before.  The thing is...I never used to promise any random person since the beginning. And that was the real way actually. Those whom I used to promise things were actually used to be my hard-core well-wishe...

Ohhh....I am here to confess my double-faced deed today. Actually this monday i.e. 8th of February is my convocation. I just didn't want to go back to the shit again (I hate my college...!!!). And so...I was trying to find options to get degree somehow without going there. Finally getting to know...that now or later I have to personally go to take the degree....I was left with no other option. But still..I didn't wanna see few people. So I chose to go later. And then letters from the college and phone calls started arriving at my place. And they were received unfortunately by my father !! Anyhow he would have known because his friend's son was in the same college. Anyway....I got a long lecture...! And now I am going !! Now unfolding my double-face....actually since we have known about the convocation dates...many of my college-mates and juniors were insisting on me to come. And I gave a big NO.. everytime!! But since now I am going....I am now convincing the peopl...

They say...that you should judge a book by its cover. But do they really follow that??? Naaaaaaaaah..!!! And thats why I did a makeover of this little corner of mine. Publicity stunt you know (wink)...lol..!!! And I really hope you guys like it. But on a serious note....I always thought and believed that beauty actually does lie in the eyes of the beholder. But as life moved on...I started exploring the crap in it. To give you an example...let me quote an incident from my college. Our college used to organize an annual National level cultural fest ZEST . There were different committees for different categories of events and the final year students were made the coordinator. In my final year...I was made the coordinator of LITERARY COMMITTEE .  Being typically myself..I was focussed to make it the best one ever. New ideas, new topics, more quality and less quantity was my basic aim. But then you know....if you wanna sell ; you have to create the customers. And for that...yo...

Many a times,we claim to have moved on....but actually we haven't. We are stuck at the same point with the same situations with just time ticking like a racing horse. You are right when you say that you are not gonna look back ever because you have never stepped ahead !!! But I believe everyone needs a second chance...to live life...to start over. Blaming the other person to have been holding you in all these times is just a lame excuse. You held back because you didn't want to lose his hand. And thats no good for you. Accept the reality...thats the only way to be realistic. Hurting yourself will give others just another gossip...no matter how concerned they claim to be. Respect yourself...keep your head high. Then only are you gonna get the salutes. Step one for moving on...is erasing the past. And here differentiating between the good and the bad times is just worthless. You will be fooling yourself that ways. Every attempt is not gonna be fruitful...you know that. S...

A minute before this post I didn't have any idea what to talk about here today...but thanks to my ANALYSIS FRIEND (if you guys remember him from one of my previous post) that I need your review on something. As always we were debating on a topic today...and this time it got a little more sensitive... (yes...sensitive!!) You all must have watched this movie called JANE TU YA JANE NA.. right? I wanna know how realistic did you find it? I mean..the talking photograph....the strike in the city...and Imran horse-riding all the way to airport and bla bla bla. And above all...the SOLO EXPRESSION ACTING  of Imran Khan and Genelia D'souza!!! I found the actors playing the role of the friends...more realistic!! But my friend thinks exactly opposite of all of this. Now for comparing it he gave me the example of an old comedy TV soap HUM PAANCH  (actress Vidya Balan was also in the show...if you remember..) where the first wife speaks from the photograph. Now thats a pole apart comp...

The movie (Ishqiya) was really superb..!! It enhanced my vocabulary :P .. and I was really impressed with the intelligent non-veg punches..!!! Ohh...I forgot to tell ...whom did I go with to watch the movie?...My mother..!!! Yes..you are reading it right. And now if your dropped mouth is back into position ..I would like to tell you that it was very fine and totally comfortable with me. Going with a friend would have been more weird I guess...because if it were a guy then uneasiness would have not allowed me to react naturally at the mind blowing  dialogue delieveries and if it were a girl...then we would have to protect ourselves from all the "men-dominating society"! Anyway...there were many so many ********** SULPHATE (if you have watched the movie..you know what I am saying) people in the theatre..that I was laughing my ass off even in the interval..!!! Many of the "gang of guys" were dressed up just like Arshad Warsi in the movie (I can't say that they...